Pages 9-12
I have now done 3/4 of the line work for my folded format! Here are the latest pages that I have completed.
Page 9:
More architecture! My plan for the story has really pushed my ability further and taken me out of my comfort zone but its very worth it as I am learning more from this than I have ever done and making great progress as an artist. The suggestions that have been made are to Darken the hand holding the torch to bring that more to the foreground and to obscure the building more where the smoke and flames are as a more effective way of showing this. This is the first iteration before I made these changes
And here is the final version after taking this criticism on board , I think its an effective change!
This page is an interesting one. There have been no suggested changes when I asked for feedback but I'm not sure how happy I am with it. It feels a little off in terms of the style, but perhaps its only me who sees this. The sign would say, if not obscured and in French, '' Protestant school CLOSED. Trespassers will be prosecuted''
This page took ages to get right, the people in the middle just didn't look right at all. I was discussing this page with some other art students, I asked, can anyone tell me what exactly is wrong with these people because I just couldn't figure it out. I knew it was wrong in some way, the anatomy was clearly off, but where I did not know. These other students also struggled, they made some suggestions and eventually I managed to get the people looking, hopefully, a bit more natural and normal. This page was such a struggle and because of that I am actually so proud of how far along it has come. When shown the final version David (tutor) did not suggest any changes, which was quite the triumph for me because before it was a mess! Here is an example of how it looked before changes, I wont post every single iteration but it was not good!
The man looks so incorrect, but how! I couldn't work it out but here is the final iteration where I feel I have managed to iron out at least some of the many flaws:
The main changes I made to his anatomy was to sort out the funky shape of his head in the previous sketch, and move the shoulders back so the arms didn't look as short. I am pretty pleased with this iteration however any further improvements to make would be welcome. This is still, lets face it, a bit of a strange looking sketch but I think it works and fits the sort of style and tone I am going for. In an even earlier version my peers said it looked like the two people were trying to have a fight, when it is supposed to look like they are trying to stay together but are being pulled apart.
Bit of a hack here, I have taken page 5 and tweaked it. I justify this because the whole point is to show how France has changed during the reign of King Louis XIV. It has been a time saver to not re draw the whole page and I think there is enough variety in the pages as a whole which allows me to get away with this. There was no comment about it made when I asked for feedback, so I'm hoping its not so glaring of an issue. Let me know your thoughts if you have any. The same changes could be made in regards to the smoke obscuring the view and the shutters being more obviously shutters,.
Reflection:
Some changes need to be made, which I will publish once completed. I think overall some good work here, I am proud of my perseverance, even when things go wrong or don't look right. I think these are solid images and will come together nicely.
This project has highlighted my strengths and weaknesses as an artist, I need to get better at drawing buildings and understanding perspective.
I am officially ahead of schedule for this project. even with the changes that I need to make considered, I'm further ahead with the folded format than I was expecting to be in my project plan, so that's great!
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